Brian McElwain Obituary

Dear McElwain family, My deepest condolences on the loss of Brian. Brian was a friend of my brother in high school. I was so sad to hear about his sudden passing.

To Brian's family,

Though this is belated, I hope this story will encourage you about Brian's life and character in hard times.

My husband and I were finally starting to write thank you notes for the wedding we had in March. We noticed that one of our dear friends left two generous gifts for us at separate times. With the second gift they attached an absolutely encouraging note: "When we ordered the spring cleanup of our landscaping in preparation for your
bridesmaids breakfast, we told the landscaper a
little about you. When he billed us for the work, he
applied a $200 discount, asking us to contribute it
to you. So we pass this along as a blessing to him
as well as to you!"

He had simply heard about our ministry in Asia, and without knowing us gave us an extremely generous gift. We wanted to personally write him a thank you note, but we hope this proclamation of his sweet heart will be even better.

Our deepest sympathy to Kathy and her family. Brian was a wonderful person. We had the pleasure to know him for only a year and it was a great year. He transformed our yard into a lovely place and every time I am outside enjoying it I seem to remember a conversation we had. And the conversation could have been about anything! He had a gift of bringing people together and finding the positive in everyone. He will be missed but always remembered.

Brian was always able to think about others first. He was so genuine in his inquiries and comments about friends, family and even clients. He may not know his impact on all of us but he will never be forgotten. Calvin and I sat across from him during dinner on Saturday night before his aneurysm on Monday and feel shocked that he is gone so suddenly...surely he will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Brian,

Your passing has come as a shock. Last time I saw you we had dinner at Vincintori's and visited with the Rotarians having their night meeting. I never gave it a thought that that would be the last time I saw you. This month came and as our thing was to go golfing or dinner for our birthdays as we are a week apart. Brian, you will be missed. Thank you for being a good friend.

Guy Lenardo

I am just sick about this. I have known Brian since high school. I learned to ski with him on a spring break trip to Colorado in 1975. Brian visited me and my wife Joan at this time last year in Boulder. He and I went to my yoga class together, and to Open Studios in Boulder, which we had visited together in prior years in the fall. We also carved pumpkins and dyed Easter eggs on prior visits. He was an infrequent but welcome member of the family over the years, and we always had fun and special times together. He was so quintessentially Brian this last visit, and by definition full of life. We will miss him dearly.
I guess this is part of growing old, seeing your friends die, but it should not have been Brian, and not so young. It makes me very sad.
Our hearts go out to Cathy and the girls. We met once when they came to Colorado. Such a sweet man and good friend...Farewell Brian. We will miss seeing you in the years to come.

My deepest sympathy to you all.

Brian was the great "Connector". As he lived his life, he had a natural gift for bringing the world together by celebrating people and their lives. He was very genuine and compassionate; and he had a heart for others, both individually as well as the community as a whole. I hope good, responsible things come from the money raised for the Katherine Legge Memorial Park Dog Fund. He cared deeply for that park.

With Brian, there was never a dull moment. I had the unique responsibility to help Brian daily at Environmental Design Associates, Inc. He knew how to cram more adventure and accomplishments into a day than anyone else I knew-- and find the blessings along the way. For example, he would disappear for lunch and always come back with either a report of an adventure he just had, someone he just met who knew someone else he knew, some new treasure he found, or all of the above. Never a dull moment.

Brian was also a huge supporter of the Indian Boundary YMCA. He was always a great ambassador for our 5:30 a.m. exercise class, always welcoming new attendees and taking an extra moment to connect with each one of us. He was my biggest cheerleader as I studied and trained to become one of the certified group fitness instructors for the class.

It is up to each of us now to take what we learned from Brian's life and try to pass it on to the world.

God's richest blessings to you all.

I've only met Brian a handful of times at family parties, but he was always very outgoing and always asked me how school was and what my future plans were. I enjoyed talking to him because of his friendly personality and attitude. Overall, a great person to be around.

I am proud to say Brian was a friend for many years and I will miss him greatly.

Great young man! Many memories. Brian will always be with me. Love, Graham, Chris, Katharine, Anna, and Lizzy Forward

I was shocked to learn of Brian's passing. He was a high school buddy and made the drive to Salt Lake City for my wedding when i was in college there and was in charge of organizing the bachelor party. My Mom often bumped into him at the dog park, so I was able to get updates on what he was up to. He will be missed.
Dean Smith

I miss you Brian. What a wonderful guy and amazing friend. Always upbeat and kind. Steadfast. Funny. Determined. Brian and I hung out in high school together. We both liked trees: planting them, caring for them, and climbing in them! Brian Mike Korn, and I had some free time one summer and built this tree fort in the woods behind my house. This was no ordinary tree fort, as it was perched forty feet off the ground in the tallest tree in the forest. No easy feat getting the first few cross braces nailed up. I can still remember clearly, as if it were yesterday, Brian shinnying out on this long branch with a hammer between his teeth one hand to hang on with and the other hauling this cross beam. Many fine memories of Brian. May his spirit live forever.

Brian was my sister Judy's friend in high school. I had four sisters; Judy was one year older and I always looked up to her and copied her. Judy's friends always were like Judy: very funny, very intelligent, very gentle and nonjudgmental. Brian was no exception. Mostly I remember Brian making Judy and me laugh at Hinsdale high school parties. I feel fortunate to have seen Brian last year for the first time since high school. Chatting with him, I was immediately transported into a familiar, timeless, comfortable ease of friendship. I'm very sorry for his sudden, early departure.

We were shocked and saddened to hear of Brian's passing. I always considered him more of a friend than our landscaper. He had a wonderful talent and not only transformed our yard, but was always curious and interested on what was going on in our lives. We always had wonderful conversations and even though I know he was busy, he always had time for us. He would always call to check in on us, and he did that a few weeks ago as well which must have been right before he died. He had a special gift and we feel tremendous sadness. Whenever we look at our yard, we will always remember him.

Stephanie and Kirk Dillard

Dear Family and friends of Brian,
I'm trying to shake off the shock and sadness enough to write something which would hope to convey the feelings my family has for Brian. God will he be missed. I hope this does not offend anyone but my first thoughts were "only the good die young". I may be overreaching but my younger sister died young as well, along with her two month old son, John Bryan, and as much as it hurt, I felt God's hand was pulling them to him. And I think the same has occurred with Brian. Brian came into my life and the life of my family about 10 years ago when we moved into our home on S. Garfield in Hinsdale. Brian was forever our HERCULES, from the moment we met until the last time I saw him. I met Brian for the first time in the summer of 2003 when he saw that our front lawn was a mess due to some renovation work and he wanted to help get it into shape for the Fourth of July parade. Brian and E.D.S. got that done and have accomplished much more meaningful work at our home. I think of Brian as a perfect Country Squire. Brian was always very positive with his thoughts on my chldren. While I think he is overly generous in his thoughts (NEVER SAID ONE BAD WORD ABOUT ANYONE IN MY PRESENCE), I learned a grace from Brian that I will never forget.
Further, I know very personally the respect Brian has for life and nature. He dealt frequently with problems that lesser creatures presented to the world and never once complained. The last time I saw Brian he was tending his parkway on 47th Street a bit and I was heading back to Hinsdale from Western Springs. We waved at each other and this was about 3 weeks ago.
I look forward to sharing more with Brian's family and close friends on October 14.
Dear Lord, please welcome home and embrace our dear Brian.
I don't know what else to say except that I am very sad.
Nancy

Brian first planted trees in our yard about 25 years ago, and from that point on he became a part of our lives and a true friend to our whole family. With his constant optimism, he nursed us through dry spells, floods and the annual challenge of putting up our Christmas decorations, always working tirelessly on our behalf. We will really miss him, and his red pick-up, big dogs and kind words for everyone. Our sincere condolences to Cathy and family, as well as Bobby and the entire McIlwain family.

It is impossible to say farewell to Brian, he will remain a part of the Westmont Business Community. This sudden and unexpected loss has created a state of shock for all his friends in Westmont. This sad news of his passing will take time for us to process. As we think of Brian, we know that Brian will be remembered for his positive and upbeat nature as well as for his get-it-accomplished approach to life. It was always a great experience to have a discussion with Brian no matter what the topic. Brian could enthusiastically speak with knowledge and in-depth understanding on a wide range of business issues. Brian was also a strong supporter of Westmont, and that support was always valued and appreciated. At this time, the prayers and warm wishes of the Westmont Chamber Members and Staff are with the family, friends and all those that knew Brian. We all share in his loss and we also all share in his memories and the impact he had during his time with us here. Rest in peace Brian, we will remember.

What a loss for your family. Brian was always so energetic, genrous and curious about life. He created many beautiful spaces for my family over the past thirty years. We will remember him when we enjoy our backyard.

Ellen, Matthew and Ann Marie Smith

Dear Cathy and Family:
I knew Brian for over 20 years and met him for the first time in a step aerobics class here at the YMCA when it was held in the Milnes room. Through the years I became the regular instructor for the class and would talk and share each morning many conversations with Brian. Brian was happy to be alive and always complimented the Y Fitness Instructors telling me how good they were. How important it was that we all got up and did this each morning. Brian would share with me the importance of his family and his step children. I too had kids that went to Downers Grove South and we would talke about the school and many times my husband and I would meet up and sit with Brian at the football games.
Brian was always very generous with his time and he had a very compassionate ear. He never said a bad thing about anyone and was never judgemental.
We were proud to have Brian as a members and as a member of the Y's Men's Club.

I too will miss Brian's energy, it was contagious. And I will miss his smiling face always. Please know that we pray for your family and may Brian's memory be eternal. I have very fortunate to have met Brian in my life.
Sincerely,
Connie Laidlaw and George Laidlaw

Cathy and all.
I have been slow in getting a card out to you because I really wanted to craft a message that let you know how much Brian meant to the Y and how time and time again, he would light up our day and affirm the work of the staff. He had such passion for the Y. I know when he traveled he stopped into other Ys and often came back to share his thoughts and insight. He's done a fabulous job over the years, on our sports fields and on miscellaneous projects here and there. In the past few years he supported the market, the golf outing and our annual Gala, giving back in so many ways with his time, energy and resources. The early morning staff and members remember him well and smile when they tell stories of him arriving late, being slightly out of sync with his classmates and always stopping afterward to thank the staff. I remember how he and you so graciously hosted the Steak Fry events and the pride he felt as he toured us through his home, introduced us to you and told stories of the two dogs. But most of all I remember Brian's work with the Y's Men's and Women's Group. He was a regular at meetings and was always an active voice. He had so many plans for this year's Christmas tree sales. We love the way he visited the LaGrange Y's program and how he came back with a vision for our 2012 project. Through new marketing efforts we were destined to succeed under his leadership in this area…now we'll need to figure out how to make this happen without him.
And finally, the memorial benches and seating area. .. After we lost Bob Jensen earlier this year, the club decided a memorial on Y grounds of some sort would be appropriate, perhaps a bench or a tree. I remember the call from Brian, who asked for time to meet. As we walked through the Y grounds and talked about the bench and other options, he said (and I'm paraphrasing a bit here) "Barb, I think we need to do something more. Bob is the first to go, but these men and women are not getting any younger, and some of them are not well. We should create something that more open-ended so we can recognize others when and if the time comes”. He proposed a seating area with a new tree, two benches, wood chips and landscaping. None of us ever would have believed in a second that Brian would be the next Y's Man we lost. The club has not met yet to discuss how we will remember or honor Brian, but I've no doubts, we will do something. We will keep you posted.
Cathy, I can't tell you how much we are all grieving for the loss of our long time Y member, a volunteer and a friend. His passing leaves a void in our morning users group, in our Y's Men/Women's Group and in my list of advisors and friends.
It's always hard to find just the right words in a situation like this. Many of us have used the word “heartbroken” to express our loss. I can't imagine what you must be feeling. We are so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the girls, and of course with Brian's other family members. “He will be missed” seems to be such an understatement and yet it sums it up so well. I wish for you the strength you'll need in the days and weeks and months ahead to move beyond this difficult time. I can't tell you how much it meant to me that you personally called to share Brian's passing (I'm just so sorry it had to go to voicemail) and that you called again after my brief stop to your house. If there is anything we can do here at the Y to help or to help keep Brian's spirit alive, please let me know.

To Brian's family, I pray that memories will bring you comfort. I met Brian at the YMCA in the early morning hours of step and bootcamp classes. He was always a bit late to class but so happy he made it to class and would jump in and get his workout in. I was lucky to have Brian do a landscappiing piece in our yard. We get many compliments. His dogs helped with the job too! I will miss his smile, laughter, and gift of design. I am deeply sorry for your loss.

Brian will be missed by all his many friends at the IBYMCA--I miss seeing him rush in for a class--he was always so nice--Carol Thies 5AM frontdesk staff

Our thoughts and prayers to the family at this untimely loss....Brian and I co-chaired the Hinsdale Beautification Task Force.I know he was passionate about his dogs and enjoyed many priceless moments at KLM.His infectious grin will be missed.
Joe Ryne

Our thoughts and prayers are with the
McElwain family at this sad time. Brian and the dogs were so much fun to see together. I would run into him at KLM,or see him with the dogs and the red pickup truck across the street at
Kaysers. He loved those picturesque
poodles and I can still see his impish grin. He will be missed. Penny B
at Kaysers across the street.

My condolences to the McElwain family in the loss of your loved one. During this time of sorrow, may the family be strengthening knowing that God comforts all the mourning ones. (Isaiah 61:2).

Cathy we are so sorry for your loss. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. God Bless you all. Rest in Peace Brian!!

I've known Brian since High School and in all that time he never failed to impress me with his energy and enthusiasm. Brian introduced me to Greek town in Chicago, irritated bouncers enough to get us thrown out of Division Street bars, talked me into jumping off cornices in Utah, beat me religiously in tennis, landscaped our yard, even planted a shag bark Oak in my front yard to celebrate the birth of my son.

This magnificent tree continues to shade our house and beautify my yard; it will forever remind me of Brian's love. I feel fortunate to have known him; he was a great friend who will be terribly missed.